SOL Tuesday: Good Stuff

Three people showed me kindness as I drove in crazy Miami traffic. Three. That is two and one more. Not just a lucky one who might have been looking at their phone. No. They actually let me go first at various intersections. That doesn’t happen to me, and I thought I’d write about it.

One of my students somehow knows what intrusive thoughts are. This morning, she found a classmate’s toy and told me, “My intrusive thoughts are telling me to keep it, haha. I know I can’t.” A few weeks ago, she asked if I sometimes had them, too. Putting aside how interesting (worrisome?) I find that a third-grader knows what intrusive thoughts are; she has made me more aware of my own.

Maternity has brought a whole new level of cruelty to these persistent mental scenarios, and it’s becoming more of a job to filter them. I am holding to the “my family is healthy” mantra for dear life so I can actually enjoy my days with them.

Driving, however, is not a situation where I had ever imagined labeling intrusive thoughts as such. Yes, I speak to other drivers in one way or another, knowing very well that they can’t hear me (don’t we all?) But as I try to pick and identify my most frequent thoughts behind the wheel, these make the cut:

• Where is she going?
• I bet he washes his car every afternoon.
• Do the baby stickers really help?
• What if I could memorize your license plate long enough to consider reporting your broken tail lights?
• I could pull over, pick up that piece of trash, chase you, and return it…
• I bet it smells like burgers and fries in there.
• What if I gently push you a little? Would that help you notice the light turned green?

Now, one might argue those are way too nice. And yes, I do get my rush of “Pleeeeease, move out of the way.” But I find it refreshing to pick out the random fun that drives around in my head with my hands on the steering wheel.

As I waited to merge onto 17th Street this afternoon, I tried to read into every passing driver to see who’d be willing to let me in. Then, as traffic slowed down a little, a guy driving a red SUV tilted his head and smiled a bit. Two thoughts followed: Wow, that’s nice! And I bet it’s because I let the woman in the black Honda make a turn this morning. Karma is real!

I’m not sure why he did it, but his kindness made me notice the two times after that when other drivers chose not to care too much where they were going enough to let me get there first.

Where am I going with this? I’m not sure. I just wanted to write something tonight, and driving came to mind. Also, noticing random bits of good in a tough day can be a good practice. If I drove down that hill, I could include my mom’s iced tea, her memorable interactions with Elena and how she said Nana, and the sweetness in her hug when I dropped her off at the airport.

I may need to notice the kind drivers in my head that want to make way for more small-moment ideas; I’m sure they’d make fun slices to write in the future.